Junkyard Quote 4, Week 7

Imma go home and get my rest. While you toss and turn all night hating me.
-My grandfather on Facebook-

Junkyard Quote 3, Week 7

"Something big and stinky, like Kiki Brown and her lemon smell-good polish".
-The Help-

Junkyard Quote 2, Week 7

"Mexican man shoes"
-The Help-

Junkyard Quote 1, Week 7

"That big old dawg with the hatred in his eyes had killed her after all"
-Their Eyes Were Watching God-

This quote intrigued me because the main character Janie is simply saying that by the dog "killing" her husband, it has also killed her. I find it a better way of saying "my heart is broken".

Free Entry Week 6

How do you avoid sentimentality when describing a moment that you experienced? Tell the story from someone else’s point of view. I recently attended a program at which the youngest Freedom Rider spoke about his experience. As we all know being a Freedom Rider was a daunting task and was one that will always be etched in the memory of those who experienced it. The part that intrigued me was that he did not tell his own story and experience, but rather the story of another who was with him during the time. At first I was confused as to why he would do this but then I remembered that when telling your own story you feel a sense of sentimentality. While sentimentality leads to truthfulness, it sometimes hinders the effectiveness of the message you are attempting to convey. By not using his own story, he was able to show a different perspective on the actions as if he were an outsider looking in. For lack of a better word it was relatable to the audience since we did not go through this either. He then followed up with a question period in which he discussed his own personal experience as the questions arose. By doing this we were able to first establish a general view of the situation and then add the emotional aspects. I feel that it was a great way of avoiding sentimentality but still delivering the intended message.

Reading Response Week 6

This is in response to “Brief reflection on accuracy” by Miroslav Holub. To start off Holub’s background in science shows in this piece due to the structure that is reminiscent of writing scientific papers. The link is as follows: http://www.poetryfoundation.org/poem/181458#poem. In this piece he shows the contrast between the nature of animals and the nature of humans. As well as the way we as humans view accuracy. The part that intrigued me most in this piece was the final stanza in which the clockmaker is speaking. He tells of the chronometer that the soldier is using to tell him time. I’m not sure if it was Holub’s intention, but for me this stanza shows man’s need to create accuracy since it is not ingrained in us as it is in animals. Being a biology major myself I have studied for years about the way animals maintain accuracy in nature; I’ve studied how animals are simply born with the skills of accuracy and precision that we long for. However we as humans must create our idea of accuracy, and even this accuracy can be manipulated by us. In a future poem I want to use his style of incorporating scientific principles with the Germanic language found in poetry.

Classmate Response Week 6, Response 2

This is in response to Taylor’s Calisthenics. This is a great example of using the steps in dialogue that we discussed in class. The way the characters seem to carry on two different conversations, but are only having one is very true to conversations in real life. My only suggestion for this work is to make a stronger connection between Jackie’s last statement, and the main character’s line before that. 

For example: “But you didn’t hear that from me,” Jackie pleaded “Oh my god. Have you seen my wardrobe on Pintrest? I have this really cute pair of midnight blueberry shoes on there”.

Classmate Response Week 6, Reponse 1

This is in response to April’s Free Entry. The opening line is very strong and immediately establishes something about the narrator. It’s a common fact that the names we give our pets tell a lot about who we are as people. I also like the unorthodox way the text uses to describe the Old West “days of dust, leather,/and wooden signs/that smack back and forth” is a great way to avoid the cliché associated with this time. Another point I of interest I found was the choice in the horse’s name and the way the poem uses a factor as simple as the horse’s name to show so much about its rider. My only suggestion is to find a way another image of the cowboy life than “under the stars/playing a harmonica”. I feel as if I have read it before. For example something an image such as: “under the stars/ listening for the gallop of thieves”.

Improv Week 6

This is an improv using the process behind “Pretty Little Rooms”. Just a rough draft.

-White House typo has Biden headed to “Road Island”-

On the Rhode Again

The savior of freshman English papers.

The curse of careless fingers.

The fiend that makes you

question your own name.

You cause heads to scratch,

and cheeks to redden.

No one is safe

From your trickery.

Calisthenics Week 6

This is based off one of the junkyard quotes I found in class.

Quote: Dead folks don’t walk backwards, they walk frontways jus’ like we do. Only difference is they walk behind us live folks, followin’ us.

The heat of the midday sun beat down on Jesse’s back. The shade of the tree gave no relief from the heat.

“Let’s walk.” Henry waved his hand, doggy paddling in the air in a failed attempt to make a breeze.

As they stepped out into the sun their shadows stretched behind them as if trying to return to the shade.

“I wonder why shadows are so long at noon.”
“Shadows are like a part of yourself that has broken off, dead and holding on to you.”

“Have you noticed how they stay behind us no matter which way we walk?”

“Just like dead folks. Dead folks don’t walk backwards, they walk frontways jus’ like we do. Only difference is they walk behind us live folks, followin’ us.”

Junkyard Quote 4, Week 6

That treaty was as strong as a virgin daiquiri.
-My history professor-

Junkyard Quote 3, Week 6

A jury consists of twelve persons chosen to decide who has the better lawyer.
- Robert Frost-

Junkyard Quote 2, Week 6

Everyone wants to be swept off their feet. But sometimes people use a rake instead.
-Friend-

This is what my friend thought of when watching Hitch.

Junkyard Quote 1, Week 6

No worries. Just add ranch. -My friend's philosophy on making life better-

Improv Week 5

This is a slight improv of “The Pain of Pink Evenings”.

She came to me in a dream. . . her feet shuffled from side to side in her ruffled socks and patent leather shoes. I always hated those shoes. The way a crust of red clay clung to the sides, stubborn and unmoving even after continuous scrubbing.

“Why are you still here?” she squeaked looking to the paper strewn office.

My eyes drifted across the room to the various balls of printing paper, traces of black and red ink showing on each one. She perched on the desk her legs swinging back and forth, her eyes darting everywhere but to my face.

“I thought you left.” My eyes lingering on the barely white teddy bear in her arms, the fur stained with black and blue ink.

“I belong here. You don’t.”

“I can stay here as long as I want.”

“Can you?”

My eyes drifted once more to the papers on the floor, before I stood and stretched. All of my joints popped at once. She hopped off the desk and began jumping up and down furiously.

“You’re finally leaving!”

I brushed past her, picking up various pieces of paper as I strolled to the door. Her hand on my back propelled me through the door, blocking me off forever. I awoke, the blinking white bull staring at me from my computer screen.

Free Entry Week 5

This is part of an “extremely rough draft” of a piece I’m working on. Suggestions are welcome.

His name was Louis. He was every girls dream when he got older, but when he was younger, no one gave him a second glance. He was silly, down to earth, an amazing artist, and wasn’t afraid to be himself. Those on the outside looking in couldn’t understand them and their relationship but for them everything was perfect. They weren’t one of those mushy couples who had to hold hands every second of the day. Often enough, their friends would find them “arguing” over silly things such as the proper way to answer the phone. I still remember the first day I met him all those years ago. His hair was pulled back in a ponytail that Kaysi tried to undo at every opportunity she got. She had warned me that he was silly but I underestimated that statement. The first thing out of his mouth was:

“Hi I’m Louis. Kaysi’s ex-boyfriend.” He smiled.

He said it like it was part of his normal greeting to all he met, knowing him it probably was. When he came to visit that weekend I couldn’t help but wonder why they ever broke up. They seemed to know each other better than any two people I had ever seen.

Reading Response Week 5

This is in response to “The Pain of Pink Evenings” by Rosemary Moore. The first time I read the play I was only focused on the actually words used. I scanned for Latinate and Germanic words, odd use of abstracts and other huge concepts. The second time however I began to focus on the details of the work. One particular moment that stood out for me is found on page 153: “I flipped through all the memories. It’s not too hard because we, my side of the family, do live in the past”.  This simple line speaks volumes to the personality of the narrator. From this we see why it is so difficult to heal from the death of her husband. The story continues and shows what this statement describes, by showing the father recounting a tale of his own. When reading I assumed he was talking about meeting his wife for the first time, but this may just be gracious reading. This also was the first time I truly took notice of the use of an interrupter in a story. Upon reading this I looked back at some of the novels that I have read in the past and realized that I had run into them before, however I had not taken notice of their true purpose.

Calisthenics Week 5

This is based off the dialogue exercise in class. I would love some feedback to see if I’m going about it the right way.

“I never like the strawberry skittles. I would always give them to my sister. I’ll never understand why she likes those; they taste like the cough syrup Dr. Pearson gave me when I had bronchitis.”

“Have you been to the health center lately? They dope you up on everything you don’t need, and put a complimentary condom in your bag. Weirdos.” Shelia pushed her sunglasses back up onto her nose.

“I was stuck in bed for an entire week with nothing to do but watch the show with the guy wearing a too tight orange jumpsuit, just because she wanted to watch it, and taking that strawberry skittle flavored cough syrup.”

A guy carrying a bag from the health center walked by almost slipping in the puddle of water left over from the morning rain.

“The cough syrup the health center gives out has codeine in it. It is so strong, for a moment you forget who you are.”

Classmate Response Week 5, Response 2

This is a response to Brittany’s junkyard quote: “your water is melting”. This quote jumps out at me for many reasons. First of is the literal, science implication of the text, which is ice, or condensation. However, on the other side of this is the opportunity for a very interesting writing opportunity. If you could find a way to incorporate this into a story it would be a great opening line. For example the story could start off being about a little boy saying this to his mom when he sees an ice cube melting on the floor and end with him telling her about the story behind the “water melting” saying.

Classmate Response Week 5, Response 1

This is a response to Debra’s free entry. Here’s the link http://kelleywisdom.blogspot.com/2012/02/free-entry_1070.html.

This is a deeply emotion based piece. The passion with which it was written shows vividly in the word choice in the piece. “The mourn of the native flute” is a great use of the unexpected, since flutes are usually associated with uplifting and jolly music. The overall tone and feelings of the poem reminds me of the stories my friend who is Native American shared with me. One note of improvement is adding more specificity to the abstractions in the piece. Perhaps there a specific dance that you could use to relate to the way the flute’s sound soars.

Junkyard Quote 4, Week 5

"My friends and I have a three way relationship. . . with homework."
-From my own personal archive of randomness-

Junkyard Quote 3, Week 5

Do not follow where the path may lead.
Go instead where there is no path and leave a trail.~Harold R. McAlindon~

Junkyard Quote 2, Week 5

There are no stupid questions, just stupid people.

~My professor jokingly~

Junkyard Quote 1, Week 5

I am so clever that sometimes I don’t understand a single word of what I am saying.
~Facebook status~

Improv Week 4

This is an improv of “I am 21”. I’m attempting to use verbs and nouns to show my character’s personality.

I placed the Tri Beta mug back in its coffee stained ring on my desk. I can feel the eyes of my roommate drilling into my head.

“It’s hot chocolate.”

I hear her relax, her concern relieved by my lie. Why is she this calm? Its finals week, isn’t it? Oh yeah she’s one of those unworried, underworked, undeclared majors. No direction that’s her issue.

The light from the computer screen is burning my eyes, tears starting to well up in the corners. Tears are secretions that lubricate and cleanse the eyes, if only they could cleanse the soul too.

My cups empty again, coffee or chocolate. I instantly reach for the coffee packet then freeze when I feel the drills firing up again. I’ll actually make chocolate this time.

Reading Response Week 4

This is in response to the final pages of Abducted by Circumstance as well as the reading by David Madden. Upon first reading the ending, I was taken aback by the seemingly sudden ending. At first I was confused as to why the novel didn’t tie up the loose ends like other novels and novelias do. However, I realized that no book I have ever read truly ties up the loose ends. There is always some question that the reader won’t get answered. This idea is confirmation of the quote Dr. Davidson always uses, “No writing it ever finished, only abandoned”. At the reading by David Madden he answered the question of why the ending was like that. His answer was simple, he knew that was where it should “end”. His answer spoke true to me because I am the type of writer who wants to tie up every loose end. But I realize now the way everyone reads is different and although you may tie up some loose ends, there’s no way of knowing all the questions that your readers might have. The novel also made me realize that by leaving those ends loose the reader is “forced” to remember the characters.

Free Entry Week 4

Making Cooter Stoop

 “Cooter soup.”

“Only your bayou bred folks call it cooter. We call it Tooter soup.”

My eyebrow rises on its own.

“It’s the proper way to say turtle, you have to add some rers.” 

My eyebrow rose even further at the Madea reference. The humor of the moment being lost my mom turned her attention to back to the iced potato in her hand. There’s an odd calm found while sitting on the back porch peeling garden grown potatoes with my mom. Her alto croon is painful beauty to my ears as she singing about how far we’ve come.

“Stop chewing on it, you gonna get a splinter in ya lip.”

I stop my assault on the match stem in between my teeth and turn back to the onion on my board. I still don’t understood how a match stem kept you from crying when chopping onions. But every time I ask for an explanation I get the same response.

“Don’t worry bout why it works, just be glad it does.”

Together we tackled the mountain of unbrushed corn teeth, then the Nerf ball tomatoes, each picked fresh from the garden, the remainder of dried soap washed off this morning.

The meat resembled over veiny pork chops and smelled of chitterlings just pulled off the stove. I watched as she expertly trimmed the nearly non-existent fat from the sides, years of working in the kitchen showing in every slide of her knife. She lets me chop up the turtle, reminding me to follow the grain of the meat, and remember the rocking chair slice.

The battle worn silver pot she sat on the stove shone from its Brillo pad massage only days before, the bottom still scratched from the assault of over 200 hamhocks.

“Time’s the only seasoning it needs”.

My eyes drift over to the salt and pepper on the table.

“Even time needs a little help.”

First the onions go in with a little bit of butter. The nutty, spicy smell playing a game of “got your nose”. After that the tomatoes go in, their slightly sweet smell sinks into my skin. Once the tomatoes have boiled down, we add the corn, and potatoes and watch them bob like the little rubber duckies as the Perry fair. Finally the star of the show arrives, we put the pieces of cooter into the pot and then it’s time for the best part . . . waiting.

I sit in front of her cross-legged like a little child listening to nursery rhymes. She just smiles at me and indulges me, telling me the same stories I’ve heard a dozen times before. Just as she gets to the part about seeing the chaos and panic caused by smoke bombs and pepper spray, the earthy smell of our soup reaches my nose.  

The first spoonful from the pot held just enough of every component, the soup thick and warm.

“Mom, isn’t this too thick for soup?”

“It aint thick enough for stew either.”

“So what is it?”

“Stoop.”

This time the humor wasn’t lost, I laughed heartily till I remembered the show we had been watching earlier.

“You got that from Rachel Ray.”  

Classmate Reponse Week 4, Response 2

This is in response to Brittany’s free entry the clouds. “The migration of over boiled egg-puss” is definitely a line that stuck out in my mind. This would be a good place for an enjambment after of.

The migration of

Over boiled egg-puss.

Putting an enjambment would make the reader pause on migration for a moment, this pause would add to the surprise and impact of the next line “over boiled egg-puss”. I enjoy the contrast of images that the text uses to describe the clouds. Each description takes me to a different time of day, and a different season. Also the final lines definitely had the “apple blossom toilet water” effect.

Points of improvement: In the text be careful of the tone thermometer. For example what would it sound like if line 4 just read as “Chocking the sun of its peach glory”. Also in line 5 consider taking out the word tears, since it can be implied by the verb crying.

Classmate Response Week 4, Response 1

This is a response to Kay’s Junkyard Quote that she got from Castle.

Quote: "Boss isn't too keen on mixed laundry."

I agree with you that this is a unique spin on saying you don’t like mixed relationships. What I find interesting is that for someone who grew up in the 40’s this wouldn’t be strange lingo at all. The same way that today we use lingo such as “give me sum dap” instead of shake my hand will someday be foreign to those who didn’t grow up in our time. In the 60’s zebras was a way of saying a mixed person, today zebra is the animal that you called a horse until you parents told you better. This quote to me shows the diversity of our language and how the connotations of words are continuously changing.

Calisthenics Week 4

I really enjoyed the litany exercise so this is mine. I know it needs some work but this is what I came up with.

To McDonalds the random fry you placed in my chocolate shake brought a salty smile to my face. For that I thank you. Thank you to the blue shirted maintenance man wandering aimlessly on my floor, thank you for allowing me to observe your graceful stroll as you walked past my door. To the free printing in the excel center, I thank you for saving me $20.54. My sincere thanks I extend to the smiling woman behind the glass in Aycock Hall, for making my morning errand a little bit brighter. To the cooks at the Z6 who decided to make hotdog tacos and bacon rice krispy treats in the same day, I thank you. To all of you who strive to make my day a little better, even if you method may be unorthodox, I sincerely and humbly thank you.

Junkyard Quote 4, Week 4

"Imperfection is beauty; madness is genius. And it's better to be absolutely ridiculous than absolutely boring." -Facebook status of a friend-

Junkyard Quote 3, Week 4

Charles LambI always arrive late at the office, but I make up for it by leaving early.

Junkyard Quote 2, Week 4

A good sermon should be like a woman's skirt: short enough to rouse the interest, but long enough to cover the essentials.

-Ronald Knox-

Junkyard Quote 1, Week 4

It is impossible to defeat an ignorant man in argument. ~William G. McAdoo~

Free Entry Week 3

I started off writing about my experience making cooter soup when I made a realization. I realized that the reason I found cooter soup so interesting in the first place was because of my deeply rooted Southern heritage. In particular my mother and the deep southern roots that run through her blood. Then I took it a little farther and began thinking that if The South ran through her blood then it ran just as strong through mine maybe even stronger. With my family living in the low country of Georgia, and the bayou's of Louisiana, my blood is as southern as it can get. My mother has always been a prevalent figure in my life and through the years people have always told me that I am the mirror image of her. It wasn't until recently that I realized that it was true, the more I age, the more I become more like her. It shows in my mannerisms, my passions, and my attitude towards life. It is because of these revelations that I wrote the following poem.

The Image of My Mother

I am the image of my mother.

A woman built

from the rubble of oppression.

A woman shaped

 by the erosion of tough times.

A woman who’s edges were smoothed

by the finesse of love.

I am my mother’s image.

Improv Week 3

This is an improv of "My Father's Love Letters." It’s not that great but it’s only a first draft.

Every day it was the same,

Walk, kiss, wave.

Her hand in mine,

Smooth from rolling dough

Guided me towards the door.

But this time it was different,

My friend’s were there.

I looked up to see her

Leaning down.

Her tulips pressing against

My forehead.

If only I could suck,

In my skull.

She smiled,

Oblivious to what she had done.

Her hand archs in the air,

But all I see is a blur of fingers.

Her love was her only redemption.

Reading Response Week 3

Upon first reading “I am 21” I didn’t see the profundity in the piece. I thought it was just about a girl telling what happened during her day and telling a little about her past. I didn’t notice the specificity and how it added to the story. It wasn’t until we discussed the story in class that the small details gained significance.  For instance the use of green tea didn’t stand out to me, until I realized that the connotation of green tea is that people who are artsy, “health freaks” are its main consumers. It would have had a very different meaning if it had talked about coffee. Another aspect I didn’t know what that the verbs you use add to the mood of a character as well. Using words like tugged and smacked wouldn’t be appropriate to talk about a happy character. Also I realized that one of the major challenges of writing it doing the unexpected. After my second time reading it, I began to appreciate the way she didn’t stay on the topic of her parent’s death long, and smoothly transitioned back to the present day. By doing this it made me think that it was still a touchy subject for her, one that she would rather not linger on. Due to this story I’m going to try and focus on using all aspects of a story: the nouns, verbs, and all other parts of speech to add to my character’s personality.

Classmate Response Week 3, Response 2

This is a response to Guillem’s Junkyard quote "Two cookies and a cow... (mumble mumble) I'm not a flying bird." This is a very interesting quote to me because it makes me wonder what brought the dream on. Often we dream about things we have seen on TV before bed or our day to day activities. When I first read this quote all I could think about was Oreos and penguins. I know this is a very literal interpretation but maybe you could write the story behind these mumbled words. You could give these seemingly meaningless mumbles a new life and an unexpected twist. Maybe he wasn’t thinking about cookies at all maybe he was thinking about a documentary that he saw earlier that day on hippos. I would really like to see you put a new twist on this.

Classmate Response Week 3, Response 1

This is a response to Taylor’s Improv of Komunyakaa's piece "My Father's Love Letters." This is a very good improv. However I feel as if some lines need clarification. Lines 5 and 6 are oddly worded to me. I believe I have grasp of what you meant but maybe you could go back and reword it a little. Also I really enjoyed the specificity of Subway. It reminds me of the parents who used to do the same thing at my school. “Every square inch swarmed with feet and flailing arms” I love that line, it’s a much better way of saying it was crowded.

Calisthenics Week 3

This exercise is based off the describing smell calisthenics we did in class.

Smell: Clean

Descriptions: Freshly opened video game

                     Bathroom right after your morning shower

Smell: Old

Descriptions: The couch smelled of peppermint and Bengay

                     Water ruined pages of Alice in Wonderland

Smell: Beautiful

Descriptions: Fresh picked peaches

                     The mothers during Sunday morning service

Junkyard Quote 4, Week 3

"If toast always lands butter-side down, and cats always land on their feet, what happens if you strap toast on the back of a cat and drop it?"
-Steven Wright-

To me this is one of those random quotes that are weird when you hear it, but you can't help thinking about it afterward.